Shades of Emotions

Image from Seema Pillay

Thoughts have no limits

“The moment we cry in a film is not when things are sad but when they turn out to be more beautiful than we expected them to be.”
― Alain de Botton
You are the one who colored my world, as I made this turn and entered your life,
You are the one who gives life to my breath, while I try to make this life worthwhile.
When you’ll be far I’ll hear you close, when you’ll be close I’ll hear you within,
When I’ll be far you’ll feel me close, when you close your eyes, a dream will begin.
The sun will shine, the stars will blink, the moon will stare as you come in my arms,
The arms will drop to hug you tight, here comes my lucky charm…
When I taste your kiss and tell you I missed, the unendurable pain will come alive,
When you feel my pain, and miss me the same just close your eyes and find me arrive.
Lonely Nights with lovely thoughts, I am counting days with painful heart
My beautiful love, I hate to accept I thought that we could stay apart.
Some thoughts will come and days will pass while you will sleep and I’ll be awake
While you are asleep and dreaming of me, a promise to you is what I will make.
Hold me tight still let me go when time comes for me to leave your world,
When your world is made with all new hopes, I will come back in like a shining pearl.
Pain will go while love will stay, when you come back smiling in my life,
On your side you will see me bright, you will always find me by your side.

My lessons in my own words

A friend of mine sent an email to me about 28 lessons life taught her. Trust me, when i say i am not among those people who read long emails. I will just skim through it and get an idea. It was at least a 3 page long email and to my surprise I read it all and was able to relate to it as well. I want to express a couple of those lessons in my own words. The reason i am writing this article today is I want myself to remember always as how important some of those lessons truly are.

1. Hang on to real friends This one is easy. My personal experience is that It is easy to make friends but difficult to maintain. The one who puts a condition with the relation is never into it because friendship is not always give and take. It needs to be unconditional. Just like love, sometimes friendship can also be one sided. Friends should be like LIC – Zindagi ke saath bhi, zindagi ke baad bhi..thanks to the one who taught me this!

2. Ditch those people who you thought were friends, but weren’t. Well I am the kind who will not forgive someone who betrayed my trust but I will also remember that once I thought that was my real friend and my above rule may apply that it needs to be unconditional but that doesnt give anyone the right to betray my trust. You are the ultimate judge for yourself.
3. Let go of relationships when they end. Not all relationships will last forever. I will just silently agree with this one and we all know that we have to let everyone go one day. It’s just a matter of time.

4. Don’t bring up the pastThinking about the past is not wrong, they do hold beautiful memories of life. I proudly accept that I do think of one beautiful memory of my past every day before I sleep, the past being anytime from my childhood till yesterday. The lesson here is not ‘to let go of past’ it’s just not to bring it up. It hurts when you compare your past with present. We need to realize we all are unique and every person we deal with in day to day life is unique.  

5. Treasure your family more than anything else in life. Well, i don’t think we need to argue about this one 🙂
6. Honour your mother. Everyone loves their mother, but there is a slight difference between loving and honoring. Think what all she sacrificed to get you this life and then you will honor her in your dreams too. Trust me this thought comes the most when she is not around and it hurts that I always end up finding the mistake on my side.

7. Treat your partner better than anyone else. They deserve that treatment for everything they have done for you. The bottom line is try to make every life you touch, a happy one, at least till you are around, the partner’s being the first.

8. Go to sleep prepared not to wake up. Because one day, you won’t. Say “Sorry” or “I love you” or “I miss you” and definitely “Goodnight” to whomever it means to be said every night before you go to sleep. Say it when you can. If you need a reminder listen to this beautiful song ‘kal ho na ho’ (and I still cry every time because I wish I’d stayed with Laika in that room where she came to give me company and never woke up after that)

9. Fight only the fights worth fighting. Before you pick up a fight with someone fight with your ego and see if it’s even worth a fight. What are you losing? Are you gaining ANYTHING? If there is only loss, then is the loss worth the pain you give and take? Fight only for a gain, not for a loss.

10. Sweep in front of your own door. Basically clean your self up, before you point fingers on ohers. Easily said than done, wont you agree?

11. Grow back stronger. After i met with an accident and got a one foot long blood clot on my leg, it took approximately an year for it to disappear and nearly 3 years for it to strengthen and get back to normal until which it pained everytime it would be slightly touched. After that, it became stronger than before. It’s useful to remember this when other things break too, like our hearts.

12. Healing takes time. In a world that moves at lightening speed and wants everything instantly, can we not wish wounds heal faster than normal? Is there no technology for that? I cannot agree more with myself. But sometimes its best when it takes time because time teaches and heals. If you were instantly healed you would never learn the lesson and end up making the same mistake.

13.  Accept full responsibility. Be accountable for what you have done, good or bad. You will never be able to influence your relationships with people untill you think It has to start with me.

14. Give back. While you are here, give it back. Be it love, respect, affection, a kiss, a hug or whatever it is. And you are mistaken if you think this has to be only a positive give back since we are talking about all philosophical stuff. No, Sometimes you have to do negative things also as part of the ‘give back’ policy. The lessons learnt are from real life and real life cannot be ideal. Sometimes you learn it the hard way.
15. Believe in God, or at least something close. Be religious or spiritual. Either will help in the long run when you are trying to find an answer for an unexplainable situation. It feels good to believe that there is someone who cannot be seen but is probably listening. That belief gives us a hope that one day an answer will come. And it always comes. It just may not be in your favor this time but never stop believing for that reason because everything happens for a reason that is good.
16. Send yourself roses. The idea is to treat yourself. This is the least you can do for all the pain you go through, be it physical, mental or emotional. If you are lucky someone will send you flowers to see that smile on your face, to thank you for being there, to say good morning. There are many reasons. If not, you may have to buy flowers for yourself 🙂

17. Be grateful. Be grateful to everyone who touched your life and helped you become a better person.